The George W. Bush Memorial Library

This is floating around the Internet; LawHobbit sent it to me, and it is too good not to post. If anyone knows the original source, let me know and I will properly credit it.

The George W Bush Presidential Library is now in the planning stages. The Library will include:

The Hurricane Katrina Room, which is still under construction.

The Alberto Gonzales Room, where you won’t be able to remember anything.

The Texas Air National Guard Room, where you don’t even have to show up.

The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don’t let you in.

The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don’t let you out.

The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room, which no one has been able to find.

The National Debt room which is huge and has no ceiling.

The ‘Tax Cut’ Room with entry only to the wealthy.

The ‘Economy Room’ which is in the toilet.

The Iraq War Room. After you complete your first tour, they make you go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes fifth tour.

The Dick Cheney Room, in the famous undisclosed location, complete with shotgun gallery.

The Environmental Conservation Room, still empty.

The Supremes Gift Shop, where you can buy an election.

The Airport Men’s Room, where you can meet some of your favorite Republican Senators.

The ‘Decider Room’ complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.

The museum will have an electron microscope to help you locate the President’s accomplishments.

Admission: Republicans – free; Democrats – $1000 or 3 Euros


8 Responses to The George W. Bush Memorial Library

  1. Dirk W. Sabin July 24, 2008 at 10:41 am #

    Don’t forget the Karl Rove Snack Bar where you are fed Twinkies while somebody shoots spitballs at you in order to provide the distraction required to pick your pocket.

    Will the coffee table implicated in the Pretzel Incident be available for viewing?

  2. Jim July 24, 2008 at 3:36 pm #

    Not sure about the coffee table, but it is hard to compete with the Desk that Monica Dented in the Clinton library.

  3. Jean July 25, 2008 at 1:33 pm #

    How about “being the dictator” room, where he’d be the only person there. This is great. The humorous mind never ceases to amaze me. Or the “Kennebunkport” room, which is the bar.

  4. Dirk W. Sabin July 26, 2008 at 12:34 pm #

    And , oh yes, there should be a Presidential Oratory Room where a troop of Chimpanzees re-enact great Presidential moments at the Podium before launching into the many mysteries of the Presidential Gurn.

  5. Original Steve July 30, 2008 at 3:09 am #

    And of course, the very last room is the “Mission Accomplished Room” where you are told the whole glorious thing has ended, but after the tour guide leaves you just keep wandering around the place for 5 more years…..

  6. Marc August 1, 2008 at 11:30 pm #

    By the time it’s opened the entrance fee for Democrats will probably be 2 Euros or $1000. Even an electron microscope may lack sufficient magnification to view presidential accomplishments.

  7. Tim King August 9, 2008 at 4:37 pm #

    Hi, Jim. You always put me in stitches (even when, I think, you don’t mean to). I’ve long admired your work, but have just discovered this blog, while looking for something completely different. (Silly me. I never thought to search to see whether you had a blog!)

    Still, some of these make me cringe more than laugh. In a way, I miss Bill Clinton, because even though his administration too was despicable, at least he was way more funny. G.W. would have done well to have hired himself just one good intern. Ah well.



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