I am sometimes criticized for being excessively harsh on George W. Bush.
I want to take this opportunity to make it clear that I don’t blame the president for everything.
This Arizona abuse apparently has nothing to do with the White House or the war on terrorism. Except unless that local fire department received a grant from the Department of Homeland Security.
My contacts near the scene of the crime tell me that, since the investigation is still continuing, it cannot yet be revealed whether the culprit was relocated from West Virginia to Arizona by the federal witness protection program.
I hope this incident does not cause people to engage in stereotyping. For the record, the vast majority of guys named “Leroy” are never charged with sheep abuse.
UPDATE: Several people have emailed me and asked me why I have refused to comment on the role of federal wool subsidies in undermining virtue in rural America. Unfortunately, the U.S. Department of Agriculture does not have an “Amber Alert” system that would provide statistics correlating, for each congressional district, the amount of wool subsidies received and the number of bestiality arrests.