The Great Socialism Sex Charade

Vox is whooping up the wacky notion that “sex was better under socialism.” Tell that to Romanian women forced to undergo monthly gyno exams to outlaw abortions because the government proclaimed in 1985 that “the fetus is the socialist property of the whole society… Those who refuse to have children are deserters.” Women’s reproductive lives were part of centralized economic planning, especially “policies to make better use of the population as a factor of production” by “stimulating an increase in birth rates.” This policy was endorsed and subsidized by the World Bank, which is currently touting itself as the friend of women.

Maybe sex was more exciting in the East Bloc because government-made condoms and other contraceptives were utterly unreliable, as Hungarian women bitterly complained to me in 1987. I rejected the sales pitch from a Romanian government agent/hooker in Bucharest, so I have  no first hand knowledge on this topic.

The Vox piece is based on an interview with Kristen Ghodsee, the author of a new book, Why Women Have Better Sex Under Socialism: And Other Arguments for Economic Independence The Guardian (U.K.) rhapsodizes that “Ghodsee’s book could not have been published at a better moment.” But the author’s thesis leans massively on a single 1990 poll that indicated that East German women had more orgasms than West German women. Soviet emigre Cathy Young summarized the criticism of that survey: “The actual findings are complicated, contradictory, and often dubious. One such survey suggested that East German men were better endowed, which mostly seems to demonstrate that Communism breeds more prolific liars.” (My experience is limited to Schleswig-Holstein, so I will not generalize.)

Ghodsee is a cultural anthropologist. Her publisher’s blurb claims her book shows “why capitalism is bad for women and how, when done right, socialism leads to economic independence, better labor conditions, better work-life balance and, yes, even better sex.” That qualifying phrase – “when done right” could apply to lots of things in life, horizontal and otherwise.  Ghodsee’s faith in  government handouts as an engine of liberation should settle any doubts about her credibility.

Here’s a sample of the zesty Twitter retorts to the Vox piece:

To keep warm in bread lines

— Country Club Man (@SpCombustion) December 12, 2018

Because they need to trade it for food?

— yokotaster (@neontaster) December 12, 2018

Because they have an entire government fucking them.

— Sr. (@Linocc) December 12, 2018

Because it’s easier to find the g-spot when a female is emaciated?

— Tony Bruno (@TonyBrunoShow) December 12, 2018

In Russia, G spot find you!

— Steve S (@PBreezeSteve) December 12, 2018

More lower body strength from picking turnips and potatoes all day on the gov’t farms I’m guessing?

— Lance Dragan (@jthunders13) December 12, 2018

Eating pets and zoo animals is an aphrodisiac.

— Narcissist sniffing dog (@Narcissist_dog) December 12, 2018

The other 23 hours and 50 minutes of the day are worse, however…it’s a tradeoff.

— Jeff Given (@ElJefe322) December 13, 2018

Because there will be no sandwich request after sex

— bernardito (@cliffantius) December 12, 2018

Q: What did socialists use for light before candles?

A: Electricity.

— Tom Naughton (@TomDNaughton) December 13, 2018

Big brother demands you orgasm.

— Raul Felix (@raulfelix275) December 13, 2018

The only form of entertainment the peasants can afford.

— Erik Charter Track! (@trackfan99) December 12, 2018

The sex in east germany was so good they had to build a wall to keep people in. They had a safety net around the wall where they shot people who tried to cross it

— Ogre Paladin (@OgrePaladin) December 12, 2018

Many of my relatives were raped and beaten in forced labor camps in the People’s Socialist Republic of Albania, guess we can file that under BDSM yeah?

— hunky Stalin (@shillz4hill) December 12, 2018

FWIW – here’s what I saw in communist Romania.  People seemed too gaunt to enjoy anything there.

Podcast: My Train Trip to Communist Hell


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2 Responses to The Great Socialism Sex Charade

  1. Tom Blanton December 15, 2018 at 12:37 am #

    I keep wondering if the commie hookers were free, or was that only for members of the commie party.
    Also, did the commie party members that were more equal get all the women without mustaches
    while those who were less equal had to settle for the larger hookers with mustaches?

    Also was the sex regulated so that there were time limits set on having orgasms and foreplay?

    With so much sexual inequality in America, perhaps Bernie Sanders can come up with a common
    sense plan to bring about fairness and sustainability to our sex lives.

    • Jim December 15, 2018 at 7:56 am #

      Your questions cut to the heart of the matter. I assume some of the socialist regimes had legions of covert bedroom inspectors. I do recall reading that the Stasi surveilled Katerina Witt and kept track of how many minutes each boink lasted. I’m guessing the esteemed professor left out that evidence because Witt’s skating performances were longer.